1. Having ONE beer and calling it a night.
Every damn time. What's the fun in that? It's not that we love sloppy drunk men, but it's nice to know our guy can take his liquor, too.
2. Not saying 'sorry'
Get rid of the tough guy bullsh*t and say sorry already.
3. Eating salads and ordering skinny lattes.
Um. You're joking, right?
4. Claiming to be a 'clean freak' when you actually mean 'human filth'.
5. Selfies and (worse!) professional photographs. Just no.
6. Wearing a full length coat that reminds us of our Grandfathers.
There's nothing worse than a man drowning in his coat.
7. Being mean about exes (ahem, asshole alert).
8. Having to be logical about EVERYTHING. Take risks!
Mediocrity is a sin. *YAWN*.
9. Stains on his T-shirt. A grown man still in need of a bib? No, thanks.
10. Still believing that 'girls don't poo'. Nah, we crap roses, petals, and rainbows...
11. Showing your girl ZERO affection because you're that comfortable.
And they're with you because...?
12. Making a girl ask you out, because you're afraid of rejection.
Is it really the end of the world? C'mon.
13. Not having a sense of humor. (If you’re not funny, smile - it's contagious)
14. Saying, 'I'm not good at this kind of thing.' Wait. Aren't we meant to be the 'insecure' ones?
15. Worrying about morning breath. It's inevitable, get over it, babe.
16. Smoking. Just ick.
17. Going for anything that has a vagina. #sleaze
18. Expecting women to take over anything organizational just because you're a dude.
Laziness. That's all it is.
19. Cute and dumb? We feared it. We did.
20. Wearing more hair product than your girlfriend. Something ain't right there...
21. Having an appetite for nothing but chips and beer. Getting us fat is not what we had in mind.
22. Not getting sarcasm. Actually, that was a joke.
23. Being shitty at your job.
For real. Back in my waitressing days, I once had to take over because he couldn't handle it. Lets just say I gave him the biggest BS excuse (ever) to get out of a drink with him.
24. Pretending you're useless in the kitchen. If you can read, you can cook.
25. Getting a fresh haircut and looking like a goon for a week.
26. Being a tight ass. You only live once, dude!
27. Not taking care of your hygiene. What MAN doesn't use deodorant?
28. Brushing his teeth is a chore for him. (Don't come near us.)
29. Having no other interests apart from eating, farting, sh*tting and sleeping all day.
30. Whining more than a menstruating woman.
31. Indecisiveness. Choose dammit.
32. Referring your friends as ‘the boys’ still. You're past that.
Is your beau more metro than sexual?
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