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Faking orgasms: Oh yes, YES!
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Putting a stop to orgasm faking

 

 - Putting a stop to orgasm faking
Determine the cause

The first step is to attempt to analyze the situation. You can do this by asking yourself what has led you to fake your orgasms: have you ever had an orgasm (whether alone or with a partner)?

If not, this inability to orgasm is most probably related to a personal issue, not an issue with your relationship.

If yes, but you're no longer able to reach orgasm with your current partner, the dysfunction is probably related to your relationship or your partner.

Consider asking for help

"In either case, it's best to start by seeking help, either through a psychotherapist if you're unable to reach orgasm at all, or a sex therapist  if you're having temporary difficulties," explains Héril.

The aim is to uncover the root causes of the problem, whether they are individual or based on the relationship.

Don't make spectacular revelations about your partner with the intention of "winning", there are too many issues at stake to make things up and/or lay the blame.

"There is a double sense of disappointment for the man who learns that his partner has been faking her orgasms," says Héril. "He initially feels betrayed then he starts questioning his manliness and self-worth."

To avoid a clash with your partner, seek advice from a medical professional.
Seeing your GP may be the first step to dealing with stressful emotions brought on by what could be sexual dysfunction.

To avoid awkwardness, embarrassment and incomprehension, you could also talk in confidence to Relate - the counseling service offers advice on relationships and sex through therapy sessions, workshops, consultations and support face-to-face, by phone and on their website (www.relate.org.uk).

But if you feel there's definite potential and you're not quite ready to admit defeat, relax, take a deep breathe and suggest trying something new. You could be surprised at how keen he is to experiment. 

Try taking a tip from the queen of sexual satisfaction, Sex and the City's Samantha Jones... literally.

Actress Kim Cattral has penned two books on the subject of sexual pleasure: Satisfaction: The Art of the Female Orgasm (Thorsons) and Sexual Intelligence (Carlton Books Ltd) - both available from book shops or online at www.amazon.co.uk.

Now there's a woman who can really fake an orgasm!

Also in Relationships:
> Does sex really get better with time?
> Learn the art of erotic massage
> Sex: how far would you go?




  
  

Love & Sex Editor
10/13/2009
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Article Plan Faking orgasms: Oh yes, YES!

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