Faking orgasms: Oh yes, YES!
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The risks of faking orgasms on a regular basis

 

 - The risks of faking orgasms on a regular basis
Blocking orgasms

"This is the paradox of faking orgasms," explains Héril. "By imitating them, you could end up incapable of actually having them!"

On the one hand, faking orgasms during intercourse causes a sort of split personailty: you end up cutting yourself off from what you're actually.

Once you're in the habit of doing this, it's difficult to then learn to re-focus on what you're really feeling.

On the other hand, "tricking" yourself and your partner in this way makes the problem look like it has disappeared even though it hasn't.
 
The dysfunction persists, or even gets worse, and you're unable to do anything about it.

"In a sexual relationship, pleasure comes from mutual adaptation, in accordance with how your partner reacts. If pleasure isn't genuine, the partner doesn't receive the right signals and therefore won't be able to give the right responses."

The paradox also occurs when the inability to reach orgasm results from a personal and individual dysfunction. "Faking orgasms is about pretending to your partner but it's also about lying to yourself."

If you find yourself faking the big O more often than not - it's time to start asking yourself some important questions.

Sometimes there can be medical or psychological reasons behind an inability to orgasm and speaking to a medical professional or therapist could really help you out. There's certainly no stigma in seeking help.

> Creating a feeling of guilt

"I see women in my clinic who have been faking orgasms for 3 - 4 years. They want to break free from the lies and restore trust in their relationship but they don't see how to do so without undermining the foundations of their relationship!", says Héril. 

In such circumstances, the amount of suffering is doubled: on top of the sexual frustration, there is a feeling of guilt and betrayal towards your partner and you may become withdrawn or even depressed, which will of course have consequences on your relationship.
 




  
  

Love & Sex Editor
10/13/2009
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Article Plan Faking orgasms: Oh yes, YES!

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