I need to turn this situation around, though, because there’s so much untapped potential. For example, one day this week there was this super-hot guy, let’s call him Muji Man, in a pale gray button-down shirt, rolled up trousers (very fashion forward, I thought) and cool plimsoles in my tube carriage en route to the office I’m working in just now. He had proper green eyes, an ear stud, cropped hair and a deliciously moody face. He was HOT. Sorry, just reliving that for a second…Anyway, we checked each other out, I’d like to think there was a shared thought process of ‘yeah, you look like my kinda guy/girl’ and I swear I could feel the tension. I didn’t do anything, well, beyond burning a hole in his skull with all my meaningful stares. But then - and get this - on the way home approximately eight hours later, he only got on the same carriage as me! What the F?! Could this be fate?!
© ABLESTOCK / Jupiterimages
Of course, this is what my delusionary romantic mind starts thinking – I stare some more and hope that he’s as pleasantly freaked as I by our double meet, but alas, nothing happens. So what to do? I’m not exactly shy (and I’m certainly prone to making a fool of myself sometimes) but I can’t for the life of me summon up the courage to make a move on the tube. But I say it again – there are hundreds of fit boys all over this goddamn city transport system of ours!