These women, though rare beings, somehow just have a way with of dealing with their children without having to raise their voice, succumbing to the stress that many moms experience with kids, or even getting into arguments with them. I know it sounds impossible, but zen moms absolutely exist. Just the other day, as I was riding on the train on my way to work, I ended up eavesdropping (I know, I know) on a mother's conversation with her son, who appeared to be at least nine years old. Throughout the entire 30-minute ride, the boy repeatedly asked her to guess a number between one and 500, and every single time his mother answered willingly with a smile.
The funny thing is that he wasn't even my kid and I got bored of the game after the first five minutes. Oddly enough, for something so simple, I came to respect that woman so much. Although she was a complete stranger and that those 30 minutes definitely didn't tell me nearly enough about her life to know whether or not she was actually a zen mom, I like to imagine that if she remained that happy and calm all the time, she probably was. However, since none of you were there to see her yourself like I did, here are all the signs of a totally zen mother if you want to know whether or not you or someone you know falls into this category:
You Never Cry Over Spilt Milk... or Apple Juice, or SpaghettiOs
It's no surprise that the majority of children can be extremely messy. Until a certain age, they don't know any better, and even then, when they get older, clutter might just become a part of their lives. Instead, as a mellow mom you just embrace the mess and might even join in on it. Yeah, so maybe your daughter accidentally tipped over an entire bottle of glitter, but you can either freak out over something small like that or just work together to clean it up and start crafting with her.
You Always Take a Moment to Pause Before Reacting
Being a zen person, you rarely if ever feel your blood boil when something goes wrong. Even if your toddler has been crying all day, having a complete meltdown and temper tantrum, or if your teen has been taking out all of his anger on you despite knowing you're on his side, you don't let it get to you. As hard as it can be, you take it all in, digest it and think through your response.
You've Already Accepted That You Won't Get Everything Right
This probably goes for many moms, so if you've acknowledged this already, then you probably have a little bit of zen in you. Basically, you've come to terms with the fact that you'll never be a perfect mother and you know there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Every woman eventually has to experience what it's like to be a new mom, learning through trial and error as she goes, and even when you think you've figured out what works and have become a pro, you still might forget about that parent-teacher conference or unintentionally switch yours kids' lunches. It happens.
You Have the Patience of a Saint
Everyone knows that patience is key to maintaining a healthy relationship with anyone in your life, but sometimes the little obstacles we face can just drive us up the wall. However, if you're a total earth mother, you've learned how to keep your calm and tolerate different things. Perhaps that means you'll sit on your daughter's bed and listen to trivial problems for three hours or give your son some space when he's giving you the silent treatment for an entire day.
You're Full of Laughter Even on the Most Chaotic Days
For some reason, you can't help but just smile. Even when things aren't going your way and your family is being a complete pain in the butt for whatever reason, you find it all so hilarious. You really do believe that laughter is the best medicine.
You Don't Have a To-Do List but You're Still Organized
Zen mothers are all about spontaneity and living in the moment. While this doesn't mean you're unorganized by any means, you just like to go with the flow and see what happens. So maybe you have all those after school activities you need to remember to bring your children to, but you like to make a mental note rather than writing everything down and stressing yourself out.
You Know When to Breathe
Whatever happens, zen moms always know when to step aside and take a deep breath when things get tough. Whether you actually meditate by yourself every day or you've found something to help you de-stress, like taking a 30-minute yoga class or listening to some Enya (hey, whatever works), you've got it all figured out.
You Immediately Think About the Positive in Negative Situations
Unfortunately, it's almost too easy to be a pessimist some days, especially when you have kids screaming at the top of their lungs wanting your undivided attention or if one of your kids has been majorly slacking off in school. And those are just a few examples of the many, many things that can go wrong when you're raising a child. However, as a zen mom you never sweat the small stuff and you've learned to pick and choose your battles.
Would you describe yourself as a zen mother? Tweet us @wewomenUSA!
This article was written by Emma Goddard. Follow her on Twitter @egoddardhokie.
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