How to tell your partner you're not in the mood for sex
Relationship advice: Gone off sex
You've just got one thing on your mind tonight: getting a good night's sleep. Alas, you sense he's got other ideas for the two of you. He's not going to be happy but you're not prepared to force yourself, sex shouldn't be an obligation after all. Ok, so what should you say?
Avoid turning your back on him and curtly saying "good night", attitudes can sometimes hurt more than words. "Your partner shouldn't feel like you're tired of making love to him," warns Jean-Paul Benglia. And if you only turn him down occasionally, it's not his performance in the sack that's putting you off so make sure he realizes that.
Best way forward
"Explain to him that you make a point of ensuring your sex life is always a source of pleasure for you, and that tonight, you don't feel in the right mood to get pleasure out of it," recommends Jean-Paul Benglia. "Try suggesting another romantic encounter later in the week," explains Francis Cautain, marriage psychotherapist.
Tell him exactly what you're going to do to him... no harm in starting the foreplay early.
Why not follow in the footsteps of Amy (26) who has found a good alternative: "When I don't feel like having sex, I ask him to cuddle me as we're going to sleep, and I replace sex with affection."